This poem explores the process of growing older while seeking meaning. It shows the confusion of life’s unanswered questions, the ongoing search for understanding, and the desire to embrace each day fully, even without clear goals. It’s about living life rather than striving for perfection.
Still, I Wake
Where do I go from here?
The question sits beside me,
quiet… but never gone.
They said, live the life given.
But no one gave a map—
only breath,
and the weight of time moving.
I am older now,
yet something in me
refuses to be finished.
So I wake—
and wonder:
what if this is the last day?
Not with fear,
but with fire.
I notice light on the wall,
forgive a little faster,
care a little less
about being understood.
The world argues loudly—
about choices, about sides—
but I just want
to feel alive before I leave.
I get dressed sometimes
with nowhere to go.
“Are you going out?” they ask.
No.
I’m practicing.
Because as long as I’m breathing,
something in me still says—
begin again, live again.
(Vijay Verma)
www.retiredkalam.com
Categories: kavita
Retiredकलम 
very nice .
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Thank you so much.
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Verma ji,
This poem stayed with me long after I finished reading it. The way you hold the quiet question “Where do I go from here?”—not as a burden, but as a companion—is deeply moving. And that line, “something in me refuses to be finished”… what a beautiful defiance of age.
I love how you turn waking into a daily practice of aliveness, not achievement. The fire without fear, the forgiving faster, the dressing up with nowhere to go—that’s not confusion, Verma ji. That’s wisdom wearing its most honest clothes.
Thank you for reminding us that beginning again is not a sign of failure, but of life still humming inside. Please keep practicing. Keep waking. We need more of this kind of fire.
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Very well penned sir . I am reading a very different perspective today as we all chase wealth, freedom , beauty , success etc . Do we wake up someday and tell ourselves we got to live today in full spirit whether we have less or more ? I think that is the question you are asking your readers through this post. As I try to understand the nuances of life I think we are all perfectly imperfect and there should be no regret in living life this way for that is the beauty of life .
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